Thursday, September 21, 2017

A visit with an Ex-Girlfriend.


When I broke up with Ex-GF-M, her apartment was filled with clutter. In many ways, it had much less usable space than mine because of all the clutter in the place. Well, I had the chance to visit her at her house, and saw that things had gotten worse since I dated her.

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My plans for the day were to take a trip into NYC by subway and see another inexpensive Off-Broadway play. By the time I got moving, it was rush hour, and I was losing time in traffic. So I called Ex-GF-M to say hello, as I'd be parking in her neighborhood. By the time I reached the subway station, I knew that I didn't have enough time to get to Times Square and then to the theater on time. Instead, I dropped in on my ex, and again received confirmation that I made the correct decision.

My ex once said that she'd never want an animal in her life, as she didn't want the responsibility to care for the animal when she went away for a weekend. The strong, musky odor of three dogs permeated the apartment when I arrived at her door, and it was all I could do to avoid gagging. The family that hosts game night in Yonkers has one dog, and I have never noticed any aroma caused by the dog or caring for that dog. With this comparison in mind, I wonder if she can handle the responsibilities of caring for her dogs. But that's another issue I do not want to tackle when I see three healthy dogs.

Both my ex and her mother in law share a house.  Even though my ex may have lost some weight since I dated her, she no longer goes to the upstairs apartment she once lived in. Instead, she lives in the downstairs apartment with her mother in law, where one of them sleeps on the couch while the other sleeps in the bedroom.  I can't see the two of them living in the sama apartment, but they do. It's probably a result of my ex having major swelling of her legs and ankles, as if she has an untreated disease attacking her lower limbs.

As much as I can still make my ex laugh, I see a certain sadness in her.  When she said that she was dating a visually impaired man (read "seeing eye dog" blind), I thought of a very nasty joke that I didn't use. Instead, I said that he sounds like the type of man who could read the story of your life in Braille. And she smiled when she heard that, as she liked the touch of his hands on her body.

It was a good, but unplanned, visit. She sees me as female now, and is comfortable with this side of me. Although I date women, I know that I will never date this woman again - and I'm glad. It's a chapter in my life that's over, and it's one that taught me that I need to process each breakup before moving on to the next relationship.




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