Sunday, October 23, 2016

Scheduling rears its not so ugly head.

I have always loved riding trains, and I think I always will.  There are some things which never change about a person, and for that I am glad.  The more I progress down my road to femininity, the more I notice which things change and which things stay the same.

This post could have started off as a political rant, given that the only thing that seems to be in the news right now is Donald Trump and his (lack of) respect for women. This post could have been about my issues in dating, where I have to make some hard decisions and have been waiting for time to sort things out.  This post could have been about family issues, and how I've avoided telling my family about being transgender. But I'm not in the mood to talk about these things today.  Instead, I'm looking to talk about schedules and how they affect my life.

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Managing my time has not always been the easiest of things for me to do. Over the years, I have developed a good idea of how things take to get done, but have never bothered to be exact.  As long as I'm within 10% of my estimates, no one generally has cared that much. However, I've noticed one tendency.  If I pay for something, or that if something is very time dependent, I will end up being reasonably exact. If not, I'm very flexible. And this has allowed me to juggle both friendships and relationships.

Now that I'm unemployed, my schedule doesn't need to be that exact. I try to schedule my days around whether I'll be in Marian mode or Mario mode for the day. On Tuesday, when I had my car inspected, I scheduled a visit to Long Island to see my Dad.  Why waste a day in Mario mode on only one appointment needing me in Mario mode.  On Wednesday, I visited RO and Pat, two appointments I would make in Marian mode. Having this kind of control is good, as it allows me to manage life in two genders without too many problems.

When I was most recently employed, getting home by 7:30 pm made it impossible to spend any time outside the house in Marian mode with my friends. I was coming home exhausted, and I wasn't getting enough sleep. Schedules were getting in my way. As much as I can use the money, my health has a greater value to me. No amount of schedule juggling could reduce the damage that the lack of usable time in my life was causing.

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Thursday was a day scheduled to be in Marian mode, as I had game night planned in Yonkers. Well, game night was cancelled. And that gave me the freedom to repurpose an evening spent in Marian mode to having a light dinner with WDJ.  This is not the kind of thing one can do when one runs a railroad. But it is the kind of thing one can do when one has a lot of slack in a schedule.  And I intend to enjoy this for a while....


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