Monday, May 9, 2016

Another reconnection....

Today, I saw a Facebook friend suggestion from someone I almost dated before I met GFJ. We were never meant to be, and lost contact with each other.  Well, I clicked on the "add friend" button, and within an hour, the two of us were chatting online....

Since this lady knows all about Marian, I mentioned how I was living life en-femme during much of the 21 months I was unemployed, and how I was having a great time.  When she saw how happy I looked in some of the pictures I sent her, she wondered - why don't I bite the bullet and transition already?  I mentioned the reasons I mentioned here all too many times, and then mentioned the headaches of commuting in the NYC Subways.  The last thing I want to do is suffer in 110 degree heat and humidity while en-femme.  Given the choice of delaying transition until I retire and suffering for 3-5 months out of each year until I retire, I'm choosing to be comfortable - as my dysphoria is very mild.

It seems that people can see the difference in me when I'm out as Marian and when I'm out as Mario.  And this means that sooner or later, I'll have to make some hard decisions regarding how much of my life I need to be out as Marian.  Will I ever look as graceful as the woman in the picture above?  No.  But that's not my goal.  I simply want to be as authentic as possible - whatever that ends up meaning for me.

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