Thursday, December 31, 2015

The holiday is coming...

As I started writing this entry, it is two days before Christmas - and GFJ will soon be coming to spend the day (and evening) before leaving for her sister's place to spend Christmas Eve, and Christmas with her family.  Although she has met my family once (due to the death of my aunt), neither of us have made any effort to bring each other into our respective family circles. Although Lili keeps pushing me to set a time limit on this, I tell her that I have this under control.  The reality is that I do have a time frame in mind, as well as other conditions that I have to keep in mind - such as finding work.

I am not completely happy with someone who merely tolerates my Marian mode.  Whoever I end up settling down with does not have to participate in my public life as Marian. But I would like for her to be comfortable enough seeing me in Marian mode, so that I don't have to plan my days around her absence.

- - - - - -

This situation with GFJ reminds me that the family I have is not the family I'd have dreamed about as a child.  When I was little, I yearned to be part of a family where I felt needed and loved.  As I grew older, I felt that I'd gain this from the families of the women I dated.  After meeting my wife, I wanted to build something with her - but that was dashed when she died of cancer. And then, I again felt that I'd get this feeling from the families of the women I was dating.  Now, I realize that this feeling may or may not come - and I've had to be able to accept this.

For the most part, holiday season has always been a burden - and even more so, now that I'm out and about as Marian.  Many of these days require that I revert to Mario, as I'm not yet in a position to tell my family that I am transgender.  But I'll accept that trade off for now - and I'll miss what should have been....

- - - - - -

Years ago, Vicki used to cook holiday dinner, and gather up the stray people in her life to be an extended family.  We need more people like her today....




Wednesday, December 30, 2015

A holiday lunch en-femme

Today, the yearly NPW lunch was scheduled, and I planned to attend it en-femme.  In a way, it is a confirmation of my true identity, as people are comfortable enough with me and my female presentation to be seen in a public place.  But this time, I'm with people who I associate with in a professional setting. And this is important to me.

- - - - - -

Overnight, I sent links for 3 garment images to Vicki and Lili.  Although I had no intention of buying 2 of the items, I wanted to see what they thought of the 2 dresses and 1 skirt.  And I got 2 very different responses.  The first item was a dress whose pattern I didn't like, but found interesting.  Lili loved it, while Vicki hated it.  Next was a dress whose color pattern I liked, but I felt something was "off".  Lili didn't care much for it, and Vicki noted that it didn't have a neckline that'd make me look good. And last was the pleated faux leather skirt. I felt that the cut of the skirt and its pleats wouldn't work for me - and Vicki confirmed my feelings.  I'm getting better with my fashion sense - but I've learned one thing - I need to see the garment on me to know one way or another....

 - - - - - -

Of course, I was running late.  And I missed an email that NPWJ sent me, asking if we could postpone our lunch.  So I ended up at the restaurant - and NPWJ stopped by to explain the situation, not having seen a response from me this morning.  I suggested that we postpone lunch for a week, and she left for her meeting.  As for me, I went to the local Kosher deli and had a pastrami sandwich.  (Not as good as Katz's in NYC, but I'll make do....)

After lunch, I went over to the GLBT center and did my weekly stint.  Not much to do today, and I may drop out as soon as I find a new gig.  So, when I left, I called GFJ - and she would be late, as she is baking goodies for her family's Christmas dinner.  It'll be nice to see her in mid week - I just wonder if we can be comfortable with each other, if we are together more often than on weekends.  Only time will tell....


Tuesday, December 29, 2015

An unexpected lunch with Vicki

Dim Sum - always a treat for me.  Ever since I learned about "Tea Lunch" almost 4 decades ago, I've been drawn to this Chinese version of "Tapas".  So much variety, and so little cost to try out a new item.  Yum!!!!

- - - - - -

Today, I had nothing on the docket, save maybe a round of resume submissions and some online training.  However, it was a pleasure to have Vicki#2 contact me and suggest lunch.  It's been a while since I've seen her, and it's always a pleasure to meet with her. (One of these days, I'll have to set up a dinner with her and the other Vicki, as I know they will get along like long lost sisters.)

I met Vicki at Aberdeen at 12:30, and then proceeded to have a nice lunch.  It was nice getting together, even though we didn't have that much to talk about today.  And then, it was off to The Avenue in Nanuet - first to see there were any interesting things worth buying, and then to drop off a job application.  (I know they have no jobs now, but at this store, they don't know me as a regular or a trans-gal. So I have a better shot at landing a part time spot there than in Newburgh - and that's better for me.  I'd rather be judged on the work I can do, and not their knowledge of me as a trans-gal who has not yet undergone transition....

When done there, I called GFJ.  She was in Jersey, and could have met me in Marian mode.  However, that was not meant to be - but it will be something she has to get used to if she wants to be with Mario.  So I decided to kill a little time, and drive to Newburgh to give the girls my holiday wishes.  It was nice to see them, but they were busier than usual - and I got out of there, instead of killing time that they could spend more productively working.

On the way back home, I chatted with Pat.  Again, she said that I should write more about my experiences as a trans person.   Maybe one day, I'll do that.  She noted that the more I experience life as Marian (and especially if I lose weight), I will encounter more of the negatives about life as a woman - I'd have to deal with men, as well as jealousy from other women.  And I commented that this will be the price I pay to develop my Marian persona as a full person. This came about from my mention of NCF's running her hands along my stocking covered legs, as well as how I felt when I wore the LBD with lace panels on Thanksgiving.  (If I had the proper plumbing, I'd have been on the prowl - and later would have had someone splitting me wide open with feet up in the air, loving every second of the experience. And Pat understood where I was coming from - something few men could even appreciate....)

Not much else - this was a long day with nothing much going on.  But it was a good last full day en-femme for a while....

Monday, December 28, 2015

Happy Birthday Dad!

GFJ was over last night, and it looks like there will be a long string of days that I will mostly be en-homme - starting with today, my dad's birthday.  My dad has turned 88, and he has become a sort of couch potato, not having many activities that bring him out of the house.

My dad is someone who is hard to shop for, given that he doesn't want anyone to buy him anything big, as it'll be more for us (my brother and I) to clean out when he passes.  So I usually end up buying him DVDs, where I know that he can enjoy some old movies without worrying about how much I spent on the gift.  However, this year, my brother decided to buy our dad a coffee maker (old style) and make it easy for me - as I could buy the first "pound" of coffee.  Little did he know that I already bought the DVDs - but I had no trouble kicking in an extra few bucks for the coffee.

- - - - - -

I use my late wife's birthday as my "Marian" birthday on Facebook.  So, when my dad's birthday comes around, there is always a touch of sadness involved - as I know that my dad doesn't have much more time with us.  And I expect that in the future, I'll be drinking to both of them at this time of year, celebrating memories of people who I cared for.

Being transgender, I have to be careful who I tell about my true identity and nature.  My dad had to deal with the negatives of my transgender nature a couple of times that I remember while younger, and I don't want to remind him of those times again.  My brother, on the other hand, does not have those memories, and I may end up telling him about myself a short time after my dad's eventual death.

- - - - - -

In the next few days, I expect that GFJ will be coming over here to spend a couple of days before Christmas.  (I don't know her after Christmas plans, but I assume that she will be here as well.)  So I expect that I'll be spending a lot of time as Mario instead of Marian over the next couple of weeks.  This means that I may have interesting things to write about, but I may have a dearth of transgender related events in those articles....

Sunday, December 27, 2015

Another string of days spent (largely) en-femme - an unexpected pleasure.

With the exception of me having to go out en-homme to get my car serviced, I had the unexpected luxury of being able to be en-femme for the better part of a week.  And I intended to make the most of it....

- - - - - -

On Saturday, I had little energy to get moving.  This has been the case more often than not lately, and I realize that since I'm not eating as late in the evening as I used to, that I actually need to eat a form of breakfast if I want to get moving earlier in the day.  

I decided to check out whether I could get a tire rotation and an oil change today, so that I could have about 5-6 days of uninterrupted Marian time - and this was not possible.  So, I figured that I'd pick up the last of my Xmas gifts at BJ's - and still, I forgot one.  But my step-nephew isn't that important to me, considering how he treated all of his family - and I'll get him a little something to open later on in the week.  Once I dropped off this booty at my place, I changed into Marian mode, and prepared for my drive to the North Country.  DCD called, and wanted to get together.  I explained the situation, and said that today was not a good time to introduce him to our group without warning.  And after a little while, I finally started making my way up North.  

When I got there, I found that it was going to be a quiet little gathering of about 7 people.  In the past, we regularly had gatherings of 15-20 people.  So it's becoming less worthwhile to make the drive up North these days.  The gathering broke up earlier than usual, and I ended up hanging out with the hostess (I'll call her NCF for now) after everyone left. Now, I should give you some background information before I go on any further.  I've said in the past that NCF is the only woman that I'd let get her hands under my skirts.  And tonight, we relaxed on the couch, while she rubbed her hands on my stockinged legs.  Boy, did that feel good.  Too bad that men can't experience this feeling for themselves!  But both of us knew that that's as far as she'd go - she enjoyed touching me, but didn't want to go further, and I didn't want to break a non-stated promise to GFJ about sexual fidelity.  (Yes, I was coming close to the limit, but I wasn't worried about reaching it or going too far.) 

Around 12:30 am, it was time to go - and I started the 2 1/2 hour drive home.  For the first hour, I was talking with GFJ on the way down.  But there was no way we'd be on the phone for the whole trip, as she had to drive her son to the airport in the morning.  At least I was wide awake for the whole trip.... 

- - - - - -

Sunday came, and it was anther "snooze bar Sunday."  There was no way that I'd wake up early and go to Church.  And I didn't feel like moving until 11:00 am, when I knew I had to shower and do my makeup before meeting with YGM. Of course, I was late to YGM's Yonkers' place - and that was OK with her.  With her 4 y/o daughter tagging along, we talked of many things over lunch, and vowed to meet again soon after we returned to her place.

Strangely enough, I was very tired after leaving YGM, and ended up taking a 15 minute nap in a  theater's parking lot instead of driving home.  I needed the rest, as I didn't sleep well the night before.  (I didn't even bother with the CPAP machine, and I know how little energy I have when I don't use the machine the night before.)

Although I could have done a couple of loads of laundry, I've put this task off until Monday, as I'll be more awake then - and still have nothing else to keep me busy.  (Yes, Lili wanted to get together, but I had more minor chores to take care of before Xmas..... 

Late in the evening, GFJ mentioned that several of her acquaintances were going to a New Year's Eve party in Dutchess County, and asked me if I wanted to do this.  I said "Yes" for two reasons - I want to spend time doing a special evening with her, and I want to be known to some of her friends, instead of being a secret part of her life.  So it looks like we're going to have a fun evening soon....

- - - - - -

Monday should be a day where people again have to deal with reality.  And for me, it was no different than for most people I know.  My task list contained the following:
  1. Oil Change / Tire Rotation (to be done en-homme).
  2. More Laundry (some of which are dresses I wore on the cruise).
  3. Purchase gifts - Candy for step nephew, and Candle for meetup grab bag.
  4. Send out resumes / apply for jobs.
  5. Pay Bills.
  6. Start online project management course.
  7. Register for course at local college.
I've gotten lazy about things over the past year and a half, and that's what relative inactivity can do to a person.  That's why I keep trying to find work - I'm too young to retire, and too old to assume that I can get by forever on the savings I have now.

Of the things on my list, I only tackled the resumes and bill paying by dinner time.  I had no desire to get out of my jammies to do anything that needed to be done.  Lazy?  Yes.  But I would need to get out of the house to buy some things I need to buy before Tuesday night, as I intended to go to a women's meetup group, where I would be expected to exchange a small value gift.  I figured it made sense to get all my Xmas shopping done early, so that I can do other things while most people are doing last minute shopping.

- - - - - -

I slept more than usual, and woke up late Tuesday morning.  This was just as well, as I had no need to get up early - as the only thing I needed to do before 2:00 pm was to again try and get the oil change and tire rotation taken care of.  And I tried to do that, and was told that the best time to drop in would be 8:00 am.  (Of course, this means that providing the free tire rotation is a mediocre gimmick to get people to come in for other services....)  

As you can guess, I ended up driving home and changed into Marian for the rest of the day.  I now had a women's meetup to go to - a visit to a bar in White Plains where we could get inexpensive drinks and appetizers during happy hour.  When I got there, I found the hostess of the meetup sitting at the bar - and she recognized me, having only chatted with me once several months ago.  Other ladies arrived, and we shifted the gathering to the back room, where we had more to drink, some food to eat, and then the "White Elephant" exchange of Christmas gifts.  For those who have never participated in this kind of exchange, it's a round robin of gift choosing, where each person can steal the gift of the person before.  I wish I had gotten first choice, as that lady got the gift I would have wanted - a nice makeup bag.  But I got second choice, and I got a pair of cozy socks (for when I didn't want to be sexy) and some "Sex in the City" perfume (for when I wanted to be sexy).  I'm glad that lady #3 decided to steal my gift, as it allowed me to get a small sampler of hand creams that I might actually use.  (SITC is a cheap perfume, and I prefer to go with $10 knockoffs of Opium or of Chanel #5.  Of course, I have a bottle of the real stuff that I bought in St. Thomas.  So why have cheap stuff that I'll have to regift?)  In the end, everyone got something nice and inexpensive - and that's what counts....

Afterwards, it was a drive home, a chat with GFJ, and then a chat with DCD.  GFJ has a problem that she must get resolved by the end of the week - it's nothing she could have expected, but it is an annoyance that ruined her mood for the day.  And then DCD....  He has another problem with his divorce, caused in part by his mom talking with his ex to be, as well as a lawyer who isn't as aggressive as DCD needs in this case.  I feel sorry for DCD, as his situation is bad, and he is going to get screwed, no matter how much he works to prevent it.

- - - - - - 

Wednesday was another day I woke up late, and I again put off the oil change.  However, I did get a response from one of the resumes I sent out - but couldn't talk to the headhunter, as I was going out the door to NPW.  Although I got to NPW a few minutes late, it didn't matter - I was not the person causing things to move slowly.  But I did find out what I'd be able to do for the next week - and then I'll bet that things will be quiescent until next year.

After NPW, I ended up going home to chat with the headhunter who never called back.  I left her a message (doubting she'd bother calling me), and then went to Lili's to drop off the picture of the two of us that was taken on the ship.  We ended up going out for dinner, but I wanted to get home and do some laundry - which I finally did.  Of course, I'd have to take the dresses that line dried off their hangers and put them into storage before the cleaning lady arrived on Thursday....

- - - - - -

Sleep did not come to me easily, and I again missed the time to get the car's oil changed. But I did feel rested when I finally got moving on Thursday, and I did get the chance to clean up most traces of Marian before the cleaning lady was to arrive.

This was a day that I planned to skip out on doing my stint at the GLBT center.  First it was a dreary day.  But more importantly, I wanted to wish my cleaning lady "Merry Christmas" in person.  (I had to cut back on what I was giving her as a Christmas gift this year, so I needed to make sure that she knew that I appreciate her efforts when she is here.) Since I don't like leaving a full sink for her to take care of, I cleaned the dishes there, and straightened up the kitchen.

As an aside....

One thing I had to do before the cleaning lady came was to buy some furniture polish - which meant a trip out to the supermarket.  I could have gone to the A&P (now Foodtown) down the hill from me.  Instead, I drove to Peekskill to see what has been done with the former A&P there. And the differences between the two stores are like night and day.  With the store taken over by Foodtown, they made sure to cleanse the place of former A&P branded merchandise before taking over the store, making sure that the place was fully stocked before putting their signs on the building.  They also cleaned up the physical plant, so that if you didn't know what furnishings came from the A&P, you'd have thought that they set up the store themselves.  However, with the store taken over by Key Food, there was a lot of A&P branded merchandise left in the store. It was obvious that they did not have a beer license yet, as most of the refrigerated shelves normally devoted to beers were either closed off, or had other perishables in their place.  Most notable were the aisles which were totally closed off, as well as the empty shelves.  I'll bet that Key Food will need much more time to get this store into shape.

But back to my life....

The cleaning lady never showed up.  So, at 5:00 pm, I started turning into Marian, and prepared to go to game night in Yonkers.  As usual, I got there a little late (rarely a problem) and was there in time for the first game.  (We take way too long to play some games - and that's part of the fun of being there, as conversation always interrupts the games being played.)

- - - - - -

Friday came, and I still had no word from the cleaning lady.  Nor, was there any word from the headhunter who tried to reach me on Wednesday.  Given the nature of some of these headhunters, all I can think of is that they get called when firms haven't found their ideal match on their own, and have gotten desperate to find a body in a hurry.  (This wasn't the case in the past.  But the world has changed, and HR doesn't screen individual resumes the way they once did.)

Considering that I had nothing to do during the day, I decided to try to get my car in for the oil change. But I was smart - I called to see if there was a lull period, and found one.  So it was off to Mavis I went - and 2 hours later, my car was ready to go.  (If I brought my car to the dealer, I'd have spent over $70.  So, by going to Mavis and getting free tire rotation, I saved $30.  Not bad for an hour's worth of my time.)

I decided to take a rest before making a decision - do I see BXM or not?  I didn't feel like rushing out, given my low level of energy.  So I sent a text to her and would let her decide.  She was comfortable NOT going to the thrift store to shop, and I got there at 8:00 pm - about 2 1/2 hours later than originally planned. And we had a nice Mexican dinner, catching up on things. It was a good thing that I went to see BXM - she was in fine form, not having any major disasters to deal with.  We chatted as two women would, BXM talking of her dates, while I talked of my cruise.  Hopefully, I'll be able to see her shortly after the new year.

And then, I returned home (with a quick stop at Walmart for Xmas wrapping paper).  I won't have any en-femme time for a couple of days - but GFJ will be here.  Even though it's for only one night, it's much better than only meeting her for dinner....



Saturday, December 26, 2015

Back to Mario

I never did play much "Mario" in any of his gaming incarnations.  But I always found the game character a little lighthearted - how can you get depressed, looking at the colorful landscape that Mario is in?  But this is not a chat about Mario of the gaming world.  Instead, this is an entry about a day in male mode, prior to a weekend en-femme.... 

- - - - - -

I had only one real task today that I ended up deferring - taking my car in for both an oil change and a tire rotation.  Not finding the time to do this has now forced me to take care of it in the morning - before I leave for the North Country.

What I officially had on my docket was a mean with each of two people. First was lunch with DCD, and then dinner with GFJ.  I ended up running late to meet DCD, but it didn't matter - he overslept and missed lunch.  So we ended up having a long phone call while I returned home.  (Had I known he'd miss lunch, I'd have taken care of the oil change.  But I also could have gotten up earlier....)

Next, was dinner with GFJ.  We met in Newburgh, and had a nice seafood dinner on the waterfront.  (It wasn't that expensive, and we even got a couple of free apple vodka shots as part of a promotion by Ciroc Vodka.)  We decided to see a movie after dinner, and the movie listed online wasn't showing at the theater.  Instead, we saw "Searchlight" - and both of us thought it was a very good dramatic film.  

It was after the movie that made me worry a bit.  She has a real issue with me being Marian, as she can easily see how happy I am as Marian, and can also see that I itch to become Marian after spending a weekend with her.  Both of us talked from our hearts, and neither of us pushed too hard, and I received the following email after I got home....

It was nice of you to wait until I left the parking lot, even though I can never go the right way to get out if there. Those are the things I appreciate to show that you care about me. 

(Part of our discussion involved me showing her in little ways that I do appreciate her and care for her....)

It was nice going out tonight and doing something different. It's easy to get into a rut.

(So true.  I'll have to be more creative in finding things we can do together, as well as ways to break out of a rut.)

It was nice talking tonight even though it is hard. I know you are not the type of person to discuss your feelings and that you would let me keep on doing something wrong just not to have to discuss something. 

(Yes, it is scary for me to discuss feelings, knowing that I am taking a risk with someone.  This is very true when I consider the fact that I need to be both Mario for her and Marian for me.)

I know I tend to only see things from my view and not thinking you sensed me pulling away. 

(She thought I was pulling away, instead of insulating myself from potential heartbreak.) 

It was a chain reaction heading to a train wreck. 

(Something, I'm glad we averted....)

This is the kind of conversation I wish I could have had with my late wife.  At least, I was able to promise GFJ that I'd always make sure that there's enough of Mario available for her.  (I won't say that if we were to break up, that I'll move even faster to being Marian 24x7.  It is only the possibility of having a romance with a good woman than makes it possible for me to enjoy being Mario.)

After we parted ways in Newburgh, I was on the phone with Lili.  It looks like her romance is likely over - there are things going on with her "boyfriend" for which she has no information, and is not likely to get a straight answer, given the circumstances.  I told her about my conversation with GFJ, and she was glad.  But she had to get off the phone quickly, as she has to go to work early in the morning....

- - - - - -

I figure that I have tomorrow morning to do some chores that require me to be in Mario mode.  And then it's several days (if all goes right) for me to be in Marian mode.....  YAY!!!


Friday, December 25, 2015

Holiday Season

Yes - Jolly Ol' Saint Nick made his usual rounds again this year, and all I wanted for Xmas (other than my two front teeth) is a new job. But I can't wait for Santa to deliver that, so I keep plugging away at my search.

It seems strange.  When I was younger, the stores were crowded at this time of year, and one had a hard time making it through the malls. Today, some stores are lucky to need to hire extra staff, as most of the holiday season shopping has shifted to on-line venues - making in-person shopping so much more pleasant.

This was the time of year that I enjoyed shopping for my en-femme self, as I only needed to say that I was buying for my wife or my girl friend - and no one cared.  Now, I shop for myself year round, and have fun doing so. In a way, this is the best Christmas gift of all - as I no longer need to hide who I'm buying for, and I can actually enjoy the shopping experience at any time of year.

I hope that you've had the chance to fill up your closet this year, and that Santa brought you lots of good cheer! 

Thursday, December 24, 2015

Back to my normal Thursday routine

I've been back home for a week, and I'm now back to my usual routine of going to the GLBT center to volunteer, and playing games in the evening.  But first, a planned visit to the doctor (en-homme), so that I could have my blood pressure monitored and have the doctor check out a mild numbness I feel on the side of my leg.

- - - - - -

So, it's been three mornings in a row that I've gotten dressed in male mode.  (And I couldn't wait to change back to female mode.)  I made it to my doctor on time (he usually runs a little late), and he checked my blood pressure (OK) then looked at my leg.  Thankfully, it's nothing to worry about (likely a pinched nerve), but it is something to monitor for changes.  (What I didn't want to say was that even if I suspected that it was something much worse, I'd never have given up going on the cruise as long as I could walk on the ship without assistance.)

It's been a little over 3 weeks since I've been to the GLBT center, and I was glad to have arrived late, as they had nothing consequential to do except for envelope stuffing.  Given how they function, I know they will ever get around to either overhauling their web site, or implement a contact management system. In short, they are going nowhere, and I need to find a better place to spend my time.

Once done there, it was back to my house (with a stop at BJ's for Xmas gifts) for dinner.  Not much - leftovers from Tuesday night (Zuppa de Pesce) that would have gone bad if I left them in the refrigerator much longer.  But it was filling.  And I rested before making my way down to Yonkers for game night.  As usual, when one gamer comes, this lady (YGJ) and I end up talking outside, so that the host and hostess can close their house for the night. And we had a great chat as usual.  Hopefully, we'll develop a woman to woman friendship outside of game night.  Only time will tell.

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Two days en-homme

The middle of the week, and I have to spend two days en-homme.  It's not as bad as it could be.  One of those days I have my co-op board's annual holiday dinner.  And the other of those days, I have the NYC PMI organization's annual holiday feast.  It'll be nice to have to have at least one opportunity to wear the suit I bought after my last interview....

- - - - - -

On Tuesday, the most important thing on my docket was to participate in my co-op's board meeting and yearly dinner. We had to hand the yearly bonus to our one employee, interview a prospective owner, and then have one last holiday dinner with the departing board member.

Well, I ended up doing a couple of loads of laundry - and then got ready to go to the board meeting.  Meeting with our super was pleasant - he was in a good mood, and was very glad to receive the bonus we offered him.  Next was the interview.  The woman was a 25+ year veteran at a major information company, and could have passed for Patty's sister. She is a person I'd like to get to know better, but I likely won't have the chance, as she lives in the upper block of buildings.

Once done with our official duties, it was off to dinner.  It was fun having a big Italian dinner with the crew, with one ex-board member and one to-be ex board member attending.  There was no way I would be able to eat most of what was on my dinner plate due to the appetizers we consumed.  So I made sure to get a big to-go container for my goodies.

Over dinner, a few of us were talking of the GOP candidates.  I mentioned that one of them would be right at home stirring up fears, and leading his followers into self destruction under the phrase: 

"One People, One Empire, and One Leader!"  

(Übersetzen Sie diesen Satz auf Deutsch , die Idee dahinter zu bekommen ....)  This is frightening to many of "the chosen people", as well as most of the GLBT community, as the above mentioned phrase would not have been translated to German as done nowdays:

"Ein Volk, Ein Reich, und Ein Leader!"
Instead, it would translate to:

"Ein Volk, Ein Reich, und Ein Führer!"

Need I say much more? At least I now know that German has incorporated at least one English word in its lexicon to make up for one lost in 1945.

We eventually shifted the conversation into matters of education (neither of us liked the focus on testing mandated by both "No Child Left Behind" and "Common Core"), and even there, we both were concerned about what was happening to America's students. We're quickly becoming a class stratified society, and no one really cares much that this is happening.

Ben Franklin would be very upset at where we are today.  When asked what type of government we were being given, he replied:

"A republic, if you can keep it."

I still hope we can do that....

- - - - - -

(A camel for Hump Day)

Wednesday came, and I was still feeling less than 100%.  I had slept for 4 hours without the elephant, woke up, then slept another 4 hours with the elephant on.  And yet, I was still not feeling fully energized.  So it wasn't until 1:00 pm that I started to finish emptying my bags from the cruise, and put dirty clothes into the hamper for laundering.  By the time I took my shower, I was already running late to make the big yearly PMI meeting in NYC.

As usual, I ended up driving to Pelham, where I could park the car inexpensively, and get into the city at a reasonable price.  And I got there with enough time to buy my ticket and pick up a soda to refresh my parched mouth.  (I didn't realize it, but I hardly had anything to drink all day.)  So, I ended up getting to the venue in time to network.

Although I never expect to gain much from networking, I did stumble into some old friends - and made a new friend by giving him some useful information about the company I used to work for.  (I wish I could still remember the names of some of my contacts there - I'd have told him to call them for more information about their Project Management training program.) Yet, I felt it was a productive meeting, as I made some new contacts - and maybe they will be able to steer some interesting things my way.


Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Believe it or not!

Robert Ripley - the real man behind Ripley's "Believe it or not!"

I find it very hard to believe that as I write this entry, that I have twice as many scheduled posts in the queue as I usually do, because of writing 11 days of posts ahead of my recent cruise.  So I figure that over the next week or two, I'll consolidate my writing, so that multiple days are compressed into single entries (as warranted) to get back to my 7 day lead....

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And now, back to our regularly scheduled program....

Monday morning came with me getting only 3 hours of sleep registered on the CPAP Machine.  Why do I mention this?  Well, the insurance company will throw a fit if I'm not using the machine at least 4 hours per day.  Since I was still tired, I figured that it was a good opportunity to go back to sleep for a couple of hours - and I didn't get moving until 10:00 am.  As a result, I had a pleasant, but short, dream - something which never happened before I was getting a deep sleep.

When I finally got moving, I figured that I had little tasks to take care of (such as Laundry), and I postponed all of them in order to relax.  Yes, I intend to get back to a higher activity level soon.  But we're in the rush to Christmas, and I'm enjoying the unexpected good weather.

GFJ called me after she got out of her colonoscopy, and she has a nasty case of diverticulitis. Of course, she could have told the doctor that. What she was looking for was to find out the cause for her digestive problems, as well as her aches and pains - which seem to be connected to her digestive problems.

After I was done with GFJ, I decided to take a drive to Newburgh to kill time - and my friendly faces were busy.  (The store wasn't that busy, but they were busy.)  Since I couldn't find the shoes I wanted, I decided to drive to Nanuet and see if they were in stock there.  On the way down, I stopped at the thruway service center to relieve myself and get gas.  As I was leaving the rest room, a woman with a Southern accent Ma'amed me, and asked about a specific fast food restaurant - wasn't there one at this stop, and I said: No - but I know that they may be at other stops - you might have remembered it from your Northbound drive. Was she trying to find out whether I was a woman or not?  I'm not sure, but she got the information she wanted, and she didn't seem shocked when she heard my reply....

In Nanuet, I found a pair of similar shoes that fit - and bought them.  I want to get used to wearing shoes with a little bit of a heel, and then gradually get used to full height heels, so when I want to wear a pair of "fuck me pumps", I can be comfortable doing so - even if I'm not on the prowl for anyone. 

Next, I returned home, and stopped at the Foodtown down the hill.  And I finally saw my favorite checkout clerk - after a month of crossing paths.  We had a good chat, and then it was up the hill to my apartment....

Since the next 2 days will be en-homme, I'll miss being able to be Marian for a while. But even with 3 days this week dedicated to being Mario, I'll still have more time as Marian - and that's what is important to me....